


Stop Drawing Dicks

by DiRoxy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Davekat Week 2016, Day Two: Cheesy AU, Fluff, M/M, Soul Mate AU, davekatweek, gratuitous usage of the word "dick"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-18 19:32:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8173264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiRoxy/pseuds/DiRoxy
Summary: You know, there was plenty of things in this world that he had come to expect. Cherish even with how weird it could be. Soul mates were just another one of those things. Everyone had one, it was just a matter of being old enough to recognize the writing on one’s arm for what it was.
It also took having a pen on hand.
And god fucking damn it, his soul mate would not. Stop. Drawing. Dicks.
---
DaveKat Week 2016: Day Two - Cheesy AU (Drawing on yourself makes the ink show up on your soulmate)





	

You know, there was plenty of things in this world that he had come to expect. Cherish even with how weird it could be. Soul mates were just another one of those things. Everyone had one, it was just a matter of being old enough to recognize the writing on one’s arm for what it was.

It also took having a pen on hand.

And god fucking damn it, his soul mate would not. Stop. Drawing. Dicks.

Karkat scowled and hastily pulled the sleeves down on his shirt, scooting past the librarian and running to the restroom to scrub the offending ink off of his arms. This wasn’t the first time he’d had to do this, it likely wouldn’t be the last either, and he was going to throttle his soul mate whenever he finally met the douche. Seriously, it was 10 am and most people would be working, or in class, or doing something other than drawing dicks on their arms. He couldn’t just keep leaving his research behind in order to hide these things.

The water in the bathroom had water pressure that was much too high and it stung his skin when he shoved his arms underneath it, and it stung more when he scrubbed harder. But he did get the ink to come off, at least on his forearms and the back of his hands. His upper arms, near his shoulders, were a lost cause. He could deal with those back at home, after he finished his classes for the day.

He made it back to his table and almost two more pages into his research when he noticed that the drawings had stopped. Or at least they weren’t dicks anymore. He could feel the ink blooming on the inside of his right wrist, and it was sheer will power that stopped him from looking at it. He needed to get this paper done, ink drawing assholes could wait.

Until about thirty minutes later when the dicks came back.

Karkat groaned and snatched up a pen from his bag, uncapping it and hastily scrawling on his arm right beneath the latest dick drawing.

-WILL YOU FUCKING STOP-  
-PLEASE-

—

Dave had started the day bored out of his mind, and when he was bored, he drew dicks. It was just a thing he had always done, particularly with his older brother. Now normally he kept it contained to his notebook but well… this particular page had filled up already and he didn’t want to flip the page in the middle of the lecture his anthropology teacher was giving.

So he started to draw on his arm.

Common sense would have told him that this probably wouldn’t be a good idea, he could bother his soul mate. Not that he had any clue if he really had one, he’d never received any ink scrawls in return to the random things he would write. So in a way, he was testing the waters. It was a little game.

How many dicks would it take until his soul mate snapped and wrote something back?

Turns out that answer was 54, and one drawing of a raven on his wrist.

For the first time in almost 20 years, he got a response scrawled across his arm. A simple request for him to stop.

Well damn it was the most romantic thing ever.

He took the hand wipe from next to his hand and wiped clean the dicks he had drawn, taking his time to formulate a response so that he wouldn’t seem too desperate about responding to his soul mate for the first time.

-why?-

Sure, that was a good enough thing to ask

-BECAUSE IT’S 10 AM AND I’M IN MY SCHOOL LIBRARY AND I WOULD RATHER NOT EXPLAIN TO THE OTHER STUDENTS WHY I HAVE DICKS ON MY ARM-

The message was scrawled back almost instantly and Dave grinned.

-what don’t keep any spare alcohol wipes on you? I’ve done this before-

-MAYBE I JUST IGNORED IT BEFORE BECAUSE I WASN’T IN A PUBLIC PLACE. THINK ABOUT THAT DOUCHE?-

-bringing out the big guns are we-  
-I’ll stop if you do something for me-  
-tell me your name?-

Dave held his breath and looked back up at his teacher, trying not to externally freak out like he was going internally. This was the most interaction with his soul mate he’d ever gotten and he was terrified of fucking it up. What if they didn’t respond? What if he’d fucked up entirely? Maybe he should have just made a joke instead about dicks and drawing or something jegus-

-KARKAT-

Their name was Karkat.

—

He didn’t expect them to ask for his name, but he really should have expected it. It was the first time he’d responded after all, so it only made sense that his soul mate wanted to get to know him. He’d originally been waiting for a better time to talk to the person on the other side, but he’d opened this can of worms so now it was time to follow through.

Karkat was about to ask for the other’s name in return when a scrawl showed up across the inner side of his left arm.

-I’m Dave-

And beneath that was a scrawl of a phone number, followed by ‘text me?’

Well, it would certainly be easier than continuing to scrawl on his arms. He sighed and pulled out his phone, entering the number in and sending one message.

Text: STOP DRAWING DICKS ON YOUR ARMS. ALSO. YOU OWE ME.

He stifled a laugh when a response came almost immediately.

Text: anytime anything so long as it’s in reason.  
Text: you mentioned you’re in a school library? Which school?

Text: UI I’M WAITING FOR MY NEXT CLASS TO START AND WRITING A HORRENDOUS PAPER ON THE FOUNDING FATHERS OF AMERICA. THEY WERE ALL SHIT LORDS AND SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT TWICE ABOUT THE SHIT THEY DID.

Text: history major?

Text: OTHER MAJORS WRITE ABOUT THE FOUNDING FATHERS  
Text: BUT YES  
Text: I AM A HISTORY MAJOR

Text: dope. I’m a anthro major, same school. We should meet up.  
Text: 5:30 at Einstein’s?

Well, that wasn’t something he’d expected. He’d heard of it happening before of course, but he’d never truly thought they would end up going to the same school.

… He was free after 5… it wouldn’t be a big deal… would it?

Damn it Karkat, make a decision. Don’t make him regret asking! Not like this was something important or whatever, like the start of a romcom. They weren’t going to meet at fucking Einstein’s and then elope the next day, falling into each other’s arms like they’d been separated at birth and had always known. There would be dates and getting to know each other and… there were steps damn it. Steps that had to be followed.

Step one was actually meeting in person.

Text: YEAH SURE  
Text: YOU’RE PAYING

—

Getting through classes was agonizing, and Dave totally was not early to the coffee shop at the top of the TLCs. Definitely not. You can prove nothing.

But the fact remained he had the best seat in the small place to see the opening and watch the people come and go. He’d even accounted for the side door that led out onto the open patio. And so when he spotted a young man walk inside, he took out a pen and drew a smiley face on the back of his hand.

Hey, it wasn’t a dick. He was making good of his sort-of-not-really-a-promise promise to Karkat.

The black haired student looked at his hand and then lifted his head quickly, scanning the area. He locked onto Dave and Dave lifted a hand in greeting.

“You could have texted me.” Karkat hiked his book bag higher on his shoulder and crossed over to Dave, taking a seat.

Dave grinned and lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “I could have, but what would be the fun in that?”

Karkat simply rolled his eyes and Dave laughed, dropping the pen onto the table. If nothing else, he could tell this was going to be an interesting relationship. Here was hoping they could hit it off.

—

Two years down the road, both of them having graduated. Dave could happily say that yes, they did hit it off. And he’d never been more happy that he could still get a rise out of his husband by drawing dicks.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! This one was a blast to write and I'm having a lot of fun with this challenge week, even if I am super behind. But hey, I'm catching up one fic at a time. ;) Anyway, I hope you're all having a marvelous day and I'll see you next time!
> 
> -Raine


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